Weigh-in Wednesday: Jan. 3, 2024

Eating healthy is expensive – here's the best way to think about that

I asked AI to make “a salad and an American flag and a bald eagle,” and this will all make more sense at the end of this week’s post.

On New Year's Eve, the Donatellis loaded up The Family Truckster and made the 90-minute drive to Hermitage, Pa., and let me tell you there's only one reason you drive to Hermitage, Pa., on a rainy, 30-degree day — and that’s to check out “Santa's Christmasland” at Kraynak's lawn and garden center.

If you've never been to Santa's Christmasland, it's a 300-foot, indoor walkway filled with room displays packed with seasonal decor and ornately designed artificial Christmas trees, which you can buy conveniently enough right there at Kraynak's. Basically, the place looks like if someone gave your aunt a half-million-dollar budget to decorate her house for Christmas. Yes, there are that many winterscape cardinals. Santa's Christmasland is a wholesome way to kill an afternoon on an interminable school winter break with 8-year-olds. There are large toy and candy sections. You were warned.

Before we went to Kraynak's, we grabbed lunch with friends at a nice restaurant called the Hickory Bar & Grille, which is where this week's moment of dietary enlightenment occurred. There is a way this story can be interpreted as I am privileged complainer, which is not my intent, even though I am privileged, and I am a complainer. Lunch proved a reminder of something many health advocates often talk about – eating healthy is expensive.

For me, healthy means no complex carbohydrates. Sandwiches and wraps and pastas are out. I'll have those once in a while, if I know I'll be active and can burn them off. In this case, fighting the urge to buy a $400 Buddy The Elf-themed LED Christmas tree does not count as physical activity. I could have done a salad, but I refuse to drive 90 minutes to eat something I could easily make at home, and the John Pinette clip sent by reader Laura at the end of this week's post accurately captures my feelings on the matter. The best option for me was a $32 surf and turf New Year's Eve Special of scallops, filet medallions and carrots.

For reasons having to do with growing up very middle class, when Bob's Big Boy was considered “going to a restaurant,” and then having been a journalist who barely scraped by for large chunks of my life, I have a very hard time spending more than $12 on any meal for myself. Also, deep down, I feel like every dollar over $12 is just the restaurant pushing it to see how much money they can make off customers who don't care how much they pay for a meal. I realize this is all unreasonable, and there are very real restaurant economics in play, but I never said I was a reasonable person. In my head, I'm always doing the math, thinking about how much I think something should cost versus what it does cost, which is why I rarely order a $30 entree, even if it’s the best option for me.

A restaurant, sadly, is no different than a supermarket. It's a struggle there, too. The cheap food is loaded with carbs and sugar and processed junk. The good food – always located on the outer reaches of the grocery store – costs more to buy and takes more time to cook. I usually wince when people say the words “the system,” but … The System is optimized for unhealthy eating, man. The corporations and Monsanto and Big Agriculture and the fat cats in Washington and the defense industry and that Pop-Tart college bowl game and … where was I?

Oh, yeah. Eating healthy costs more than eating poorly. It's the way it is. What can you do about it?

You can pay more.

But I don't want to pay more. I'm cheap.

It's OK to pay more. You're eating less. Remember — you're skipping breakfast and having a protein shake for lunch.

That's true. I am buying and eating less.

And what are you doing with the money you're saving?

I hadn't thought about it. Probably wasting it on my kids.

You don't have to make that mistake. You could spend it on healthier foods.

That's not a bad idea.

You're welcome.

Who are you, anyway?

I'm The System's worst nightmare, man.

Drum roll, please...

Starting weight: 187

Last week: 180

This week: 179

Goal: 170

Lost another pound. ALMOST halfway to goal. Feeling good about that.

Shout-outs

• Laura responded to my post about holiday eating and my anti-roll tirade from last week: Maintaining during Christmas week is big. I was also able to do the same, but this next week is a bit tricky. There is still a lot of food around the house, especially if you hosted, and a lot less pressure. It's easy to eat mindlessly. Fortunately, I am watching my 2-year-old granddaughter, so there is very little sitting.
  
  I married into an Irish family. They are very much into rolls (like every meal). A good Italian bread is a staple in every Italian family, but I have gotten away from that, especially at a holiday meal. I still put out rolls but avoid them completely. The kids who claim not to like anything at the buffet can always stuff themselves with rolls.
  
  And as far as salad, well there's a John Pinette clip for that too. I tend to eat the salad first so that I eat less of the other foods. This helps especially when ordering pizza. I can eat a whole one, so I try to have some salad first, and that helps me eat only half the pizza. Of course, you have to add your own dressing or it defeats the purpose.
  
  Good luck next week!

Laura – what you described is the perfect salad strategy, which are two words I never thought I'd write together, but here we are. While I don't love a salad when premium healthy and delicious foods are available at restaurants and at Christmas, I do enjoy a salad when my options are limited, like on pizza night or when the main dish is pasta. Salad isn't satisfying, but with a salad you're not going for satisfying – you're defending against hunger. In war, offensives earn victory, but a proper defense keeps you from losing. Defense is all about preventing the worst possible outcome. That's a salad's job. ¹We want salad on that wall. WE NEED SALAD ON THAT WALL. We use words like "fiber", "net carbs", "gut health." We use these words as the backbone of a life spent not eating trash foods nonstop. Others use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a nation that rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very health that salads provide, and then questions the manner in which salads provide it! I would rather you just said "thank you, salads" and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a salad fork, and grab the olive oil. Either way, I don't give a damn how many dinner rolls those kids think they are entitled to!

Do you want a buddy to check in with on some goal of your own? I'm here for you. Leave a comment or shoot me a message.

1. Scene from my forthcoming play, “A Few Good Salads.”